Anu Apte


Anu. What? You never heard of her? Come on. You know you did, so you better recognize. Girl’s only been working in this business since devlinsfirst loved livvy (editor’s note: that’s a substantial enough time to respect Anu’s cred yet short enough time to honor her youthful radiance).

Anu is sole proprietor of Seattle’s Rob Roy, a bar the world knows for it’s chainsaw band saw crazy knife ice magic, and the locals cherish for it’s luscious glow vinyl groove no pretension happy warmth. As for Anu, the person, she can best be described as chainsaw band saw crazy knife ice magic luscious glow vinyl groove no pretension happy warmth. Seeing a connection here?

At Rob Roy, there are lovely cocktails, lovely sounds, lovely touches, and lovely people… and there are free Teddy Bears. They look like goldfish crackers, but they are Teddy Bears. You must snuggle them.

Before Rob Roy, Anu… ah screw it. Who cares what came before anyway? When the legendary Rakim spoke “it ain’t where you from it’s where you at,” Anu listened. And where she’s at is Rob Roy. You can find her there most of the time. You won’t find her elsewhere most often, but you will find her at the Left Coast vs East Coast Libations dinner at this year’s Tales. Her opening salvo for this event, ricocheting across the nation before it ever begins, also comes from Rakim:

“It’s been a long time, I shouldn’t have left you
Without a strong (drink) to step to
Think of how many weak shows you slept through
Time’s up, sorry I kept you.”

Anu is ready for you. Are you ready for her?

Anu’s favorite thing about Ted Munat: How on those late lazy summer evenings, when the glow of the sunset casts shadows and beams of orange in just the right places, he starts to look like a cross between Vincent van Gogh and Leon Trotsky, and for a moment one can imagine that this picturesque landscape is nothing more than a mural Ted’s doppelgangers painted with Diego Rivera before they were all brutally slaughtered by Stalinists, as indeed we all shall be one sunny day.